“Before I Formed You in the Womb, I Knew You”

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb…Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be” – Psalm 139: 13,16

 

I always wanted to have five kids, but I met and married my husband later in life, so we only had two. As I’m sure many moms would say, my two sons are the best sons in the world. And I appreciate the fact that God blessed me with the opportunity to be a mother, especially since my first pregnancy (just after we married) ended in a miscarriage.

When I became pregnant again months later, I was elated.  I can still picture the smile on my doctor’s face when she told me my son had a “strong heartbeat” (unlike my first pregnancy). In that pregnancy and the one to follow, I had an amniocentesis to check the health of the babies within me. As women age, the chances of having babies with Down Syndrome increase and my chances were relatively high. It was during my ultrasound and amniocentesis of my second son that I discovered he an “echogenic heart” and “echogenic bowels,” which are two soft markers for Down Syndrome. In other words, babies with Down Syndrome often express the same symptoms. The doctors next informed me that I could “terminate the pregnancy” if the results of the amniocenteses indicated Down Syndrome.

Needless to say, I was extremely stressed over the days following as I awaited the results. I poured through articles on the internet, trying to learn more of what it would mean to be a “Down mom.” It was at that point that my husband and I determined that I would be a Down mom if God blessed me with a child in that way. I had once been “pro-choice,” having even driven a friend to an abortion clinic in my twenties, but I now had a new perspective. I couldn’t imagine killing my own son out of what I considered to be an inconvenience.

When the amniocentesis results came in, I was happy to discover that my son did not have Down Syndrome. Life would be easier. But during my days of studying the disease, I learned a lot. I learned that people with Down Syndrome are extraordinarily loving, gentle, kind, humble, and beautiful. I read much from parents of such children who felt extremely blessed.

Perhaps some don’t realize this. Tragically, since 2000, almost 100% of the mothers who had prenatal testing in Iceland chose to abort their babies with Down Syndrome. Click here for details: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/down-syndrome-iceland/

Abortion is a very complex issue. In the United States, about 1 million abortions occur annually (Earll, 2018). Below I have pasted some statistics on abortion from a group called “Focus on the Family.” Note that the vast majority are not due to rape, incest, or for health reasons.

“According to the 2014 CDC report:

  • More than 22 percent of abortions are chemical – up 10 percent from 2011
  • Nearly 80 percent of abortions are surgical
  • 40 percent [of] women who had abortions in the U.S. had no other children
  • 44 percent of women who had abortions in the U.S. had at least one previous abortion
  • 85 percent of women who had abortions in the U.S. were unmarried
  • Almost half of abortions are among women and teens 24-years old and younger.”

According to “Guttmacher Institute, the research arm of the nation’s leading abortion seller, Planned Parenthood:

  • At current rates, an estimated ¼ of American women will have an abortion by the age of 45.
  • About 15,000 abortions are attributed to rape and incest – representing 1.5% of all abortions.”

People who consider themselves “pro-choice” often point out that many women cannot afford to have children, which is a reason they use to justify abortions. Yet what these women may not have considered are the long-run implications of such choices. Regret, sadness, and the question of how life would have been had they continued their pregnancies surely must arise for some of these women.

In addition, some women who have had abortions were somewhat misled. Instead of referring to their children as fetuses, doctors referred to them as “tissue.” Instead of referring to the procedure for what it was (murder), the term “D&C” was used to “terminate the pregnancy.” These terms unfairly desensitized the pregnant mother to justify the procedure and mitigate guilt. Such desensitization should be avoided – and we should educate people on their options.

Among the options is to seek an adoption lawyer. Adoption lawyers connect pregnant women with pre-screened, loving parents who are willing to pay the bills for the pregnancy, legal fees, and hospital stay. Sometimes they are people who were unable to bear their own children and all of the time they are appreciative of the opportunity to raise the children of moms who cannot raise their own children. Steve Jobs, Apple’s founder, was an adopted child. And look at the way he changed the world!

In conclusion, we should all adopt a pro-life position, encouraging pregnant mothers to thoughtfully consider all of the options available to them. We should also encourage them to view their ultrasounds, as  seeing their unborn child may help to change their minds about having an abortion. If abortions remain legal in the United States, let’s consider what Bill Clinton said about them: they should be “safe, legal, and rare.”

Finally, given the estimates on the number of women who have had an abortion in the United States, it is likely that at least one may read this article. Our past helps to shape and inform our future. Don’t look back. Look above. God is looking to forgive you – if you have not yet asked.

Thank you for your time.

References:

Earll, C.G. (2018). By the numbers: U.S. abortion statistics. Focus on the Family. Accessed July 18, 2018 at: https://www.focusonthefamily.com/socialissues/life-issues/dignity-of-human-life/abortion-statistics

 

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